Alexander Portnoy's spiritual heir?

I would advise my more squeamish readers to skip the link I'm posting here (and maybe stop reading right now) but ...

A guy was busted on a flight to Denver for, uh, pleasuring himself in his seat.

Sick!

(That said, I also think that no bail sounds a little ridiculous.)

Somewhere, Philip Roth is smiling...

For the record ...

As I mentioned a couple of days ago, my mother was pretty horrified when she saw the dedication of my book.

The dedication in question ("To my parents -- who never loved me enough!") was intended as a joke. Even though my mother doesn't find it funny, my father thinks it's hilarious -- and was even suggested by him!

Sort of...

When I told him I was dedicating the book to him and my mother he said, "Oh, no! Only if you say something like, 'To my parents -- who never told me they loved me enough.'"

I thought it was a really funny line and an hour or two later sent my editor the dedication, "To my parents -- who never loved me enough!"

"That is not the same thing!" my mother has since taken pains to tell me. (Along with the somewhat overly dramatic: "This is worse than what Philip Roth did to his parents!")

Well, OK. As someone in journalism, I recognize that the two are not quite the same thing. Not telling someone you love them enough is not the same thing as not loving them enough. She has a point. (But, come on, mom!) In any event she has asked me to issue a correction. Very well:

"To my parents -- who never told me they loved me enough!"

The dedication

So the book finally arrived!

And, like a dutiful son, I immediately took the first copy over to my mother's office to let her take a look.

Upon looking at the dedication she said, "This is the worst day of my life."

Later, when I called her up to see if she was really serious she said, "This is worse than what Philip Roth did to his parents..."