Happy new year!

Here's wishing you a (slightly late) Happy Year of the Dragon!

I actually wrote an account of a food crawl I took in Chinatown a couple of weekends ago here.

Of the places I went to, Peking Duck House was my favorite.

...But as a Chinese-American friend of mine said when she heard the list of places I had visited: "Ah... you had Chinese food for white people."

It's sort of true. To get a really good Chinese meal, I almost think Manhattan Chinatown is over. You have to go to Flushing. (There are, of course, great and authentic Chinese restaurants in Manhattan -- but very few of them are in Chinatown.) But if you're looking for a place to celebrate, check out Legend for some seriously good Sichuan food.

Back to the grinder

Hey schlubfans!

I know it's been a long time. They're keeping me busy at the old newspaper mill.

Like, for example, this big round-up I did of new (or newish, in some cases) sandwiches.

Almost all of these sandwiches are worth trying. Although some are certainly more worth trying than others.

If you had asked me yesterday which my favorite was, I would have said BaoHaus. BaoHaus, for those of you who follow my musings closely, is the domain of one Eddie Huang. (I wrote about this young man exactly a year ago. Go figure!)

But I should also add: I did check out the place this afternoon to see if they had gotten any traction from my article, and the wait was far, far nastier than anything I had experienced in the past. And the frenzy of people made the food suffer, slightly. (If I had to write the thing over I definitely would have adjusted the waiting time. Which was very good the first time I was in. But a good 15 minutes today.)

My runners up were City Sandwich and Num Pang.

But I definitely got a new lunchtime sandwich shop to replace Subway, and that's Potbelly.

Queens flush

I'm a little late in posting this, but here's my round-up of the secret restaurants of Jackson Heights, Flushing and Elmhurst from last month's New York Post. (My colleague --and fellow Queens inhabitant -- Kirsten Matthew did L.I.C., Astoria and Woodside.)

I went on this high caloric expedition with Vikas Khanna (of Junoon), Danielle Chang (of Lucky Rice) and Zak Pelaccio (of Fatty 'Cue, Fatty Crab -- and many other Fatty enterprises.)

My fellow Queens readers will notice that a number of the classic Chinese restaurants of Flushing were sort of ignored. I told Danielle that we could not go to either Hunan Kitchen of Grand Sichuan or Spicy and Tasty. (Once a restaurant has been reviewed by the Times food critic -- as both of those great restaurants have -- it's no longer such a secret, in my view.) But nevertheless, she picked some excellent spots. (You should definitely try the Taiwanese shaved ice spot.)

But my favorites had to be the Elmhurst restaurants (if for no other reason that they were the biggest surprise.)

In fact, we didn't even have space for all the places we visited. We went with Joe DiStefano, author of any serious Queens' resident's go-to blog, World's Fare. (Joe's recent coverage of the new Flushing mall might have made my "secret restaurants of Flushing" list had I been choosing instead of Danielle.) One of the restaurants that we visited (which didn't make the cut) was Java Village -- an Indonisian place that Joe thinks is the best restaurant in Elmhurst.

I was sorry we weren't able to include it. It was awesome.

Happy hunting.

Straight Flushing

Learn all about the condo wave hitting Flushing, Queens in my story in yesterday's NY Post Home section.

This was one of those stories where I couldn't justify doing a massive food roundup video along the way (maybe I could have, but the holidays interfered) but, of course, a fresser like me has much to talk about in the Flushing Chinese food scene.

There are at least two restaurants on Robert Sietsema's favorite-Chinese-restaurants-in-NYC in Flushing that I'm dying to try.

Unfortunately, I rarely try out new places, 'cause I'm wedded to the old ones.

My favorite will always be Spicy and Tasty. But there are many, many other places to get one's Szechuan or Hunan fix on. Definitely try Hunan House. For dumplings, I like White Bear (just make sure that they're open -- I've been shit out of luck plenty of times). And, of course, one shouldn't leave Flushing without getting at least one $1 Peking Duck sandwich at Corner 28. And one shouldn't miss Xi'an Famous Food for noodles -- although it's less essential than the others. (Not because you shouldn't try it, but Xi'an got so popular that they opened another branch in Manhattan. But a Flushing Xi'an expedition is worthwhile, because it is in a sort of seedy food mall with all sorts of delicious spots nearby.)

Are Asian mothers the same as Jewish mothers?

The common joke in my family when I was growing up was that my mother could come home with a 95 on an exam and my grandmother would say:

"And what happened to the other 5 percent?"

There's clearly a perfectionist element in the Jewish character. (I was mostly spared this because my parents realized early on that no amount of nagging was going to get me higher than 78 percent on science and French exams.)

But wait a minute... hold on, here.

Is it possible that Chinese mothers are exactly the same way?

As evidence I present Eddie Huang.

Huang is the chef behind Baohaus (which is delicious, if slightly overpriced) and Xiao Ye, a Tiawanese canteen sort of restaurant.

Today, Sam Sifton tore Xiao Ye a new asshole in the Times. (It sounded immensely unfair to not even give it a single star given the fact that Sifton really flipped out over a number of the dishes.) Huang is accused of (among other things) not taking the restaurant environment seriously -- sitting in the dining room on his blackberry, rather than managing the place.

Fair enough -- Huang was gracious about it on his blog... but then Huang's mother calls the review "a review of your life."

And she's just getting started! She is a mother who is not happy with the fact that her son has not used his talents to the desired effect. He has not mastered the basic discipline necessary in running a restaurant and it's holding him back.

Whoa! Mrs. Huang, calm down.

I'm most impressed that Eddie had the balls to post this email from his mother on his Web site. It proves several things:

1) He has a tight relationship with his mother. (How Jewish!)

2) His mother is unafraid of making criticism. (Ditto.)

3) His mother's criticism is, well, sharp. (Three-for-three, so far.)

I actually have no idea how sharp the criticism is. Mrs. Huang gets points for being detailed and a clear writer (which is sometimes mistaken for sharpness) who has very definite ideas on what he has to do to make his restaurant better. But even though at this particular moment, I would expect a parent to be more supportive, one can also sense the love underneath the surface: Her Eddie is clearly capable of so much more!

And I could hear this kind of critique out of the mouths of many of my family members.

Yes, we are a similar people. (And, quite frankly, this made me want to try Huang's restaurant.)

If you're considering a heartattack...

To my Queens readership out there, I'd like to make a recommendation:

Hunan House, in Flushing. (137-40 Northern Blvd.)

Every time I go to Flushing I inevitably wind up at Spicy and Tasty. Which is great, but if you're looking for a little variety in your Chinese food, you should give HH a try. I went there with the schlubette a few nights ago (we're not dating!) and the menu was incredibly authentic. (There's not a General Tso's chicken in sight.)

Maybe even more authentic than Spicy and Tasty. (For a full rundown on the weird dishes on the menu, check out Joe DiStefano's article. I wasn't that brave.) Much less crowded. And cheaper.

The dan dan noodles were thick and delicious -- and only $4.95. (And perhaps hearty enough for a lunch.)

We ordered something called a pumpkin cake which I can best describe as a pumpkin latke. Very tasty. (Very not good for you.) And unlike most potato latkes, which has a lumpy consistency, the pumpkin filling was pureed down to something smooth and delicious.

Finally we had the Mao's Braised Pork dish. Which only people who do not have health problems should eat. The pork was served in thick cubes that were half-fat, half-meat. I stuck with eating only the meat half and the greens it came with. And the dish was so decadent that we only ate half of it. But I will also say it was outrageously delicious -- some of the best pork I've ever tasted.

If you go, just bring the lipator.

"Soy sauce is so American!"

Two years ago, when Frank Bruni reviewed the great Flushing sino-dining temple, Spicy & Tasty, the mood around my office immediately turned grim.

"I want to stab Frank Bruni in the fucking eye," was the reaction of one Chinese friend of mine.

A review like that (for a restaurant like S&T) is usually the kiss of death. It would only be a matter of time before the effete Manhattan fressers showed up in Flushing and packed the restaurant. It would only be a matter of time before S&T raised their prices and decided to rest on their laurels. Spicy & Tasty, we decided, was a goner. (There's also something heartbreaking about knowing a great secret that is suddenly revealed to the entire world.)

In fact, it wasn't long at all!

I went a month or two after the Bruni review with my parents (who were serious S&T fans) and it had already gone down hill. Having been back a few times since I can say that it has improved itself -- but it isn't the same Spicy & Tasty it once was.

I had a similar moment of foreboding when I saw Julia Moskin's food story about Chinese food in Flushing in today's Times.

But there are three reasons, I think, why we foodies shouldn't worry.

1) The story wasn't written by the restaurant critic -- which means that the places mentioned are not treated with the same regal deference. (What the hell was Frank Bruni writing about a restaurant where nothing on the menu is above $20, anyway?)

2) There are simply too many dumpling shacks and noodle houses for any one to get a swelled head. Let the yuppies spill into Flushing! They aren't going to all converge on Nan Shian at the same time that they're all at Imperial Palace.

3) It really is a kick ass article. There's a great Web-only interactive map showing where all these places are and what to get at them. I had only heard of one or two of the restaurants mentioned -- so you know where this schlub will be eating on Sunday night. It involved real reporting (Chinese sesame bread is from the Muslim minority? Who knew!) And, of course, there's the great quote: "Soy sauce is so American!"

Do not listen to this man!

Unlike my other foodie friends, I don't usually join in the pile ons against Frank Bruni. When he encounters something he doesn't like (like Ago, for instance, or Kobe Club) he can be a pretty funny writer. And while his taste is hit and miss, he's a pretty good judge. Mostly.

But I have to say, his review today of Szechuan Gourmet was just ridiculous.

I've never actually sat down at Szechucan Gourmet, but in my free-wheeling pre-cholesterol-worrying days, my editor and I used to order in from there pretty frequently.

It was decidedly mediocre. (Better than average -- but only slightly. Not nearly as good as Wu Liang Ye if you're looking for Chinese food in the Midtown area.)

However, we stopped ordering from Szechuan Gourmet when we ordered lunch from them one day and it took them more than an hour to deliver it. I got into such a fight with the lady on the phone that I told my editor, "I can't ever call there again. I think I'm on a list."

Oh great...

It's official:

My diet is about to go completely to shit.

Rob and Robin of New York magazine are out with their cheap eats issue of 2008 (always the schlub's choice for best issue of the year) and this year's list looks really, really good. I haven't tried a single one of the burger joints on the list. And aside from Artichoke and South Brooklyn Pizza, the pizza joints are also all news to me. (I'm sort of excited...)

Also, lots of Thai places in Queens that I'm sure I'm going to wind up sampling over the next few weeks.

And I was even intrigued by the sort of oddball things. Smoothies and chinese food at Grand Sichuan House? (In my old neighborhood of Bay Ridge, no less!)

Oy... I'm totally screwed.